Wheeling Zürich (part 1) – The Kind Samaritans

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Money, money, money
Must be funny
In the rich man’s world
Money, money, money
Always sunny
In the rich man’s world

Abba

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Along the river, in front of Grossmünster.

KLM-woman (at the counter) “Are you going to send the bag?”

Me: “Yes, that was kind of why I put it here.”

KLM-woman: “Well then, it costs you 134 kroner.”

Me (negatively surprised): “Am I not allowed to send one single item without paying extra?!”

KLM-woman: “No. Are you sure you don’t want to carry it on board?”

“Yes, I really don’t bother to carry my bag all through the airport and on the plane”, I answered and picked up my Visa card. Somehow this was going to be slightly symptomatic of my journey to Switzerland…

Me: “Can I have a window seat?”

KLM-woman: “No, there is none left. And besides, new rules from KLM says that disabled people shall under no circumstances be placed in the window seat.”

Me: “Uhum, really…?”

KLM-woman: “But you can try asking again at the gate. They might be able to change it.”

So I did. And at the gate I got the same stupid answer.
“No seat for you!”
At least not by the window…

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If you have a window seat you might be able to see the Swiss alps.

But things were going to change. When I got on board I met the handsome steward R…

R: “Where are you going?”

Me: “Uhm, Amsterdam. Or maybe you were referring to seats? 10C”.

R: “Not anymore!”

Me: *just blinking*
Me: “Ok?” (Am I at the wrong plane or something…?)

R: “I am hereby upgrading you to business class. You can sit at the first row. Would seat F be ok with you?”

Me: “Ehm, yes indeed. Thank you very much. You are the first in….maybe ever, to upgrade me to business class.”

R: “I am happy to be your first…” (with a grin)

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The Netherlands is flat, isn’t it?

So then I sat there on business class and had first row all by myself. In your face KLM!

And R was instantly upgraded as my favourite steward of all times. If I didn’t have a date in Zürich, I think I would have flown away with him anytime. But I am sure he was gay anyway…

R: “What would you like to drink?”

Me: “Well, I think this calls for prosecco or something. Do you have that?”

R: “Well not really, but you can have champagne. Would that be ok?”

Me: “I think I will be able to survive…” (still grinning)

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Life of leisure in business class…

In Amsterdam my transfer gate was really close, so I wheeled myself over to the gate and sat down to relax. After 5 minutes a Russian-sounding woman came over.

Russian woman: “Hi. How are you?”

Me: “I am fine thanks, how are you?”

Russian: “Fine. I was just wondering if you would like to come with me to a secluded place, so I can pray for you.”

Me: “Uhm, no thanks. I am fine the way I am (actually very fine today to be honest)”

Russian: “Are you sure? You know, Jesus loves everybody.”

Me: “Ehm. I am sure. But you know…I am not a Christian, so I think I decline your offer.”

Russian: “Are you really really sure? You know, everyone has a special place in God’s heart.”

Me: “YES. I. AM. SURE. PLEASE GO AWAY!”

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And during the week-end we were surrounded by muscular men with a t-shirt saying: “I finished the Iron Man.” I think they would be sexier without the t-shirt… But Jesus loves everyone.

And then she went away. And I was wondering who the next kind samaritan I would meet on my way would be…

I guess they were more of the usual kind. One and a half hour later I was in Zürich. And the minute the other people had left, I was greeted by two super friendly Swiss assistance guys: “Grüezi”. A word I was going to hear a lot of times during the coming week-end. But no matter how hard I practiced, I would never manage to pronounce it correctly.

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The Swiss (this one from Australia) – quite similar to Norwegians I think, but still a mystery to me…

According to my guide book, the Swiss are both polite, a little bit strict and have most things in order. Not very false advertising I would say…

At the airport I met my friend, we took the train to the main train station and decided to walk from there to the hipster hotel I had chosen for us – the 25 hours hotel.

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25 hours hotel in Zürich – übercool, friendly and accessible.

And I must admit, the hotel was so cool it deserves a blog post of its own. After a pitstop with pasta at Santa Lucia in Josefstrasse, we arrived at the hotel where we spent the rest of the evening relaxing with drinks at the super cool patio. La vita e bella.

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And of course. The guys at the neighbour table were…Norwegians. They are everywhere!

But in Zürich the vita is also expensive. Turns out the cocktails cost 16 CHF (Swiss Franc) each!! My goodness! This is more or less the same as 136 kroner, which makes our hotel bar more expensive than ANY bar in Oslo. I never thought that would be possible to be honest…

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In Zürich you can buy designer bags made of used car equipment if that suits you. The Freitag shop is however not very wheelchair accessible.
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Or you can shop at Tiffany’s at the airportt…

Zürich is oldfashioned, modern and hip at the same time.
And it will ruin you, in some way or another…

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2 thoughts on “Wheeling Zürich (part 1) – The Kind Samaritans”

  1. Oh my, business class. 😉 And also, I thought gimps are always placed in window seat, so that in case there is an emergency, all the (more important) able-bodied people rescue themselves first? 😀

    • I know. 🙂 Having a C-seat and boarding first is ridiculous. Usually you still get window seats at other airlines. But it seems KLM now has new rules for the WCHC because they assume they cannot transfer to a window seat. I got an evaluation form after my flight, so I complained about it and said this should be an individual judgement by the check-in. Not the crew.

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